Fidget Spinner Trucking

Murray Pratt Blog, Humor, Trucking

“Thanks for calling Fidget Spinner Trucking – how can I help you?”

“Um… ah… I was wanting to move a piece of construction equipment and need to get a quote from you guys.”

“Okay… what are you trying to move?”

“It’s a backhoe, and I need to get it over to a work-site near Frankfurt. Do you guys do flat decks?”

“Oh… just a minute – you are the third customer this morning who phoned in wanting some heavy equipment moved – we only have one flat deck trailer left so I am going to add your name here to my Fidget Spinner and… what is the name of your company again?”

“It’s Hope Construction Services.”

“And you are?”

“Marty – Marty Mortensen.”

“Oh hi, Marty. I am Penelope”

“Hi Penelope”

“Is that H-O-P-E Construction Services?”

“Yes – um… what are you doing?”

“I am just adding your name to the third clover of my Fidget Spinner. There it goes”

“You’re what?”

“Wow… you should see this sucker spin, Marty!”

“What are you doing?”

“There are three customers who want this flat-deck, and I have put each of your names on the fidget spinner as a way to allocate the trailer.”

“You’re using a fidget spinner?”

“Totally. We have like 150 of them around the house with my 4 kids n’ all… and I asked our trucking software provider if they could do an integration with a fidget spinner – so they put it in their new Dispatch module.”

“Your trucking software provider integrated their software with a fidget spinner?”

“Yep – pretty innovative huh?”

“That’s crazy. This fidget spinner craze is getting way out of hand. I had heard that industry is coming to a halt all over the world because there is a shortage of ball bearings, but this is totally nuts.”

“Well Marty, they are going to have to do something with them. Remember when they had to plow all the Cabbage Patch Dolls into the landfills in the 1980s? Well they are getting more imaginative in their recycling efforts  – and nothing speaks to recycling like the cycling activity of your average fidget spinner. In fact they coined an entirely new term for it.”

“They did?”

“Yep – it’s called the ‘Internet of Spins’ – or iOS”

“Isn’t that Apple’s mobile operating system?”

“Nope – we use the big letter ‘I’ as in IOS!”

“Haven’t they come after you guys on this for squatting on their acronym?”

“Nope… but we have a Greek Island sending us some p-r-e-t-t-y nasty letters though”

“Is it still spinning?”

“Yep… still going. It’s a multi-colored fidget spinner – a total blur, looks like the way a doped up 68-year old hippie might remember Woodstock. Still going!”

“Is it slowing down?”

“Um… looks like its losing a bit of momentum”

“How am I doing?”

“I think your odds are good – 33.33% – so you never know”

“Well that sounds okay. Hopefully I can get the flat deck”

“That’s just the first part of it… you should see the rest of my desk. I am spinning three tractors and I have another one spinning for the three drivers we have available”

“You have separate spinners for tractors and drivers, too?”

“Yep – the transportation software company put in several hooks into their software through their ASPI”

“Their ‘ASPI’?”

“Yes –  their Application SPinner Interface”

“Is it slowing down at all?  I mean, I really need to get that piece over to the construction site by Thursday at the latest”

“Listen – try me back at the end of the day and I will give you an update then. Hopefully one or two of them have stopped by then. Maybe someone will spill some coffee on one of them, or one of the drivers will come in and accidentally knock my desk.”

“O – o- um – okay.”

“5 pm?”

“Sounds good.”

Share this Post